Fixture

With the sun shining like it was no longer fashionable, the Sarries welcomed Whitchurch RFC to the Rec. The Sarries were certainly out in numbers, which gave the coaching staff a chance to rest some of the squad, and they still had a squad bigger than the leftover food in Mikes beard.

The game kicked off with Gwyl putting the ball right on the 10m line, Whitchurch claimed the ball and kicked the leather of it. The ball was scooped up by the good looking No:10 but whilst he was waving to Mum & Dad, his kick was charged down, again...

With the famous Piggy Fiddler at 15, the ball was soon back in the Church half, and they were then lining up for their first lineout of the day.  With a knock on at the line out by the Sarries, it was time for the two sets of forwards to lock horns 15m in.  With a push and a shove, the home team took the scrum against the head. With the ball flying through the hands of the Sarries back line, it was soon the turn of Shaun ‘The Model’ Dunphy to be heading for the whitewash. Unfortunately, he was tracked down and bundled into touch by a man half his height and twice his size (fat).

With the Sarries applying all the pressure, a great tackle by Mr Dunne, resulted in a splendid run by the Skipper, who off loaded the ball to Tommy Tippy who scored under the posts for the first points of the game. The extras were then added by Gwyl.

It wasn’t long before the Sarries supporters were treated to another bit of magic as a Church player was stripped of the ball, and the backs were at it again. This time it was the turn of self-confessed posh totty Matt ‘The Mott’ Dowling to cross under the posts. With Gwyl still waving to his parents, cheeky Luke Eden claimed the ball and dropped it between the uprights.

Whitchurch kicked off, and after an infringement the Sarries were awarded a deserved penalty. With the boys eager to keep up the intensity, a quick tap penalty was taken and Ian Dunne crossed for his first try in years. Gwyl popped the ball over the posts, and his parents waved back.

Sarries continued to pile on the pressure, and after a huge kick up the field and a great chase by Sam Cartwheel, the Sarries were awarded a scrum 5m from the Church line. After a solid scrum Rob ‘Eddie’ Jones picked up and fell over from 1m out to score the Sarries next try.  Gwyl waved, oh and he got the extra two points.

The Church soon found themselves throwing in at the lineout, but on a day when the boys could do no wrong, Tommy Road ignored the 16 man overlap to his right and crossed for yet another try. Gwyl, well you know, kicked the points.

With Gwyl changing the point of attack, he leathered the ball down the length of the pitch, which resulted in the front row forwards face dropping as they then had to get to the other end of the field. It was at this point, that Mr Cubbs would tell anyone who listened what a great game he had the week before, and he was clearly being rested for ‘The Big One’ (not sure what he meant).

After a lengthy stoppage, Whitchurch soon found themselves in opposition territory after a succession of indiscipline by Da Homies. With the Sarries defence trying to keep the enemy out, a lapse in concentration allowed the visitors to cross the line and add the bonus 2 points.

With the Sarries stung into action, it was the visitors who would feel the full displeasure of Rob Jones who crossed over again for his second try of the game. Gwyl forgot to wave which resulted in hi, missing the kick. Fool!

Half Time: CSRFC 40 WRFC 7

With the game restarted, the Sarries were soon on the attack again. This time heroes turned to villains, as firstly Shaunphy ignored a 3 on 1 overlap only to get clobbered and seeing stars, and then Ian Dunne squandered a 5 on 1 overlap. It was time for the bench to come into play, as both players were left on. Matt was replaced by Josh as he had a date, and Skipper was given a rest as Sideshow Bob Owen wanted to play.

Josh wanted a rest straight away, so decided to ask the ref for a yellow card. The ball was kicked down the field by Whitchurch, and with the Piggy Fiddler having a mare, the next phase of play was a scrum to the visitors. The Sarries held firm again, and Rob Jones scooped up the ball again and galloped down the field like he’d missed the ice cream van. With the Church defence folding like origami, Rob was over for his hat-trick (something he may later regret). Gwyl waved, and scored.

From the kick off, Jon ‘The Babymaker’ Phillips, snatched up the ball and ran it back to the waiting pack. From the resulting scrum, the Sarries were off again, and Old Evergreen soon found himself with ball in hand, looked at how far it was to the try line, and decided to pass it to Sam Cartwheel who scored his first try for the club (all noted).  Gwyl added the extras and then waved.

The Church continued their kick off practice, and after a terrible re-claim, scrum to Whitchurch. After another great scrum by the boys, Rob Jones scooped up the ball and whipped it out to Gwyl  who scored under the posts whilst waving. Gwyl kicked the conversion and with tears in his eyes after scoring his first try for the club (all noted), waved, again.

Again, the Church kicked off and after another poor reclaim by the Sarries, the visitors found themselves with a scrum on the home teams 5m line. After a blatant infringement that only the ref could see, the Sarries found themselves on their line defending. With the visitors tails up, they crashed over the line for their second try of the game.

This led to another change, as ToRo was reduced to waterboy as an old injury flared up again Zzzzzzz. With the Jack out of everybody’s way, the field was opened up again, and Whitchurch knew there was no coming back as Chris Parks slicked back his hair and rolled back the years to score again for the Sarries.   Guess what? Gwyl converted and guess what? He waved to his parents.

With the clock ticking on, and Little Giles Cross threatening to straighten Phillips teeth out, Seth rumbled up the field and with forwards and backs linking up, it was if the team play was written by Dylan Thomas. This piece of magic resulted in Monsignor Dunne crossing unopposed under the posts. Gwyl scored!

With Whitchurch praying for the final whistle, and me with writers cramp, the club let Bryn Wheeler score so we could guarantee some more funding from the WRU. With Gwyl sick of waving, the kick was added.

With the visitors kicking off for the final time, the Sarries were awarded a final scrum. After another great scrum, the team linked up again and Mr Dunne scored the final try and his hat-trick try (all noted).  Gwyl placed the ball on the tee, and methodically bisected the uprights.

Final score: CSRFC 89 WRFC 12.

This all leads to the moosive game this coming Saturday, as Sarries take on the league leaders at the Rec.

Billy ‘All noted!’ Williams.